


aftermath

by Craftybadger1234



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Apologies, Awkward Conversations, Don't copy to another site, Family Dynamics, Other, Sexuality Crisis, implied asexuality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27923089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Craftybadger1234/pseuds/Craftybadger1234
Summary: Harry apologises to Albus for being an arsehole when Albus came out to him.*There's no onscreen fight. The fic picks up when Albus storms out.
Relationships: Albus Severus Potter & Harry Potter, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Scorpius Malfoy/Albus Severus Potter
Comments: 4
Kudos: 78





	aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> Big thanks to CleopatraIsMyName for reading this over, especially with the things she's got going on. You are amazing!
> 
> I wrote this after reflecting on the generation gap b/c I'm Harry's age and some of my kids are around Albus's age. I was about 30 before I ever heard the word asexual in reference to people and not amoebas. But now it's just out there as one of many options for my kids to consider. That's brilliant and strange and all new.

“Albus, please don’t go-” Ginny pleaded, chasing after her son.

But too late, Albus reached the perimeter of the wards and Apparated away. She covered her face with her hands for a moment, then stomped up the porch steps, slamming the door behind her. “You fucking idiot!” she yelled at Harry. “What the fuck is the matter with you? Why would you say those things to our son?!”

He backed away, anger and confusion and the black, heavy weight of failure choking him. “I - I don’t know! I was just - it was so -”

“Albus came here to tell us something important and difficult and you pissed all over it like a fucking _child_!”

“I’m sorry! I just got home from work and I’ve got a hundred things on my mind and then this and the timing wasn’t great and I wasn’t _ready_ for it!”

“Fuck you and all your excuses, Harry!” She stomped up the stairs, but her voice carried as though she still stood in their cottage’s foyer. “And it’s Albus you should be apologising to!”

Harry scrubbed at his face, kicked off his heavy work boots, and went to the kitchen to find a stiff drink. He grimaced at the auror uniform he hadn’t managed to change out of before Albus began his nervous speech about growth and change and love and Scorpius.

Gay.

His son was gay. 

And fuck if Harry knew how to feel about that.

\--------

After a silent dinner and a restless night of sleep, Harry didn’t expect Ginny to have much to say to him at breakfast. But she set a plate of eggs and toast at each of their places and sat across from him, asking, “Have you come to your senses yet? Ready to apologise?”

“I don’t know. Probably. Or maybe not yet. There’s loads I don’t understand and he’s so young -”

“He’s the age we were when we started dating again.”

Harry sighed down at his eggs as memories surfaced of those first years after school ended for them. “I don’t know if that’s a good example.”

“No, maybe not,” she said quietly, taking his hand. “But we should be happy for him - getting to be young and carefree in a way we never were. And now he’s on his own, growing up, learning who he wants to be.”

Harry opened his mouth, but Ginny cut him off. “If you are about to say this is just a phase, I’m going to transfigure your eggs into a bird that will fly away and leave you hungry.” They shared a small smile. “Life is a series of phases, Harry. Some come and go, others stick around. But it doesn’t matter whether this is real or temporary - our love is not conditional.”

“I know. And I still love him. How could I not?”

“I don’t know, but I know he’s upset and probably feels some kind of rejection right now.”

Guilt burned in the back of Harry’s throat. “I know. I said some shit things I shouldn’t have. And now…” 

“I think you should go talk to Neville.”

“Neville?” That hadn’t occurred to him at all, but now that Ginny mentioned it, it seemed the next logical step.

“Yeah. Maybe Al talked to him before finishing school back in June. You know his students come to him for advice all the time, and Albus has always been close to his godfather. Maybe he can help you too.”

On this beautiful autumn Saturday, Harry didn’t have to worry about work getting in the way, and Neville didn’t have classes to teach. The timing was good for it. Briefly he wondered if his conversation with Albus would have gone better if the timing had been better. He’d still had so much on his mind from work, and not enough mental power to focus on something that needed such delicate handling. But it all happened so fast, and now what was done was done. Likely there _was_ no perfect time.

After breakfast, he kissed Ginny on the cheek, and made two apparition jumps to Hogwarts. As expected, he found Neville in the greenhouse, nursing some plants that looked like they’d been over-pruned. Probably poor first or second year work.

“Harry! What a surprise! Everything all right?” Neville pulled him into a bracing hug and slapped him on the back. “Ginny? The boys?”

“Er, yeah, mostly.” Harry sat on a nearby stool to watch Neville work. “I came to talk to you about Al.”

“Yeah? Is he all right? He just wrote last week. Didn’t mention anything there.” He swirled his wand over a tiny plant and a tender green leaf unfurled from the stem.

“No, he wouldn’t have. It was… last night. He was visiting with me and Gin and… He came out to us.” He spoke the last slowly, worried he’d overstepped if Albus hadn’t confided in Neville.

“Ah.” Neville set his wand down and pulled a stool up next to Harry’s. “It didn’t go well, then?”

Harry scrubbed at the scar on his forehead, partly in relief. “Nev, you would not believe what a fucking arse I was about it all. Just absolute word vomit coming out of my mouth that I couldn’t stop. He got angry - of course, he should have - and stormed out.”

“Oh Harry, I’m sorry.”

“I feel like shit. Gin is pissed at me. And Albus… I have to fix this. Did he say anything to you? Maybe before he finished school? Something that would help me understand?”

Neville sighed, gathering his thoughts. “Yeah a little. Especially when he and Scorpius talked about getting a flat together. He wasn’t sure if he should tell you then, or wait.”

“Why’d he decide to wait? Or did he tell you in confidence?”

“No it wasn’t a secret or anything, he just… You know Albus doesn’t like to make a fuss about things and I guess he got used to keeping it to himself. He and Scorpius didn’t make a big deal about it here around the school at all. I’m not sure how many people knew.”

Harry nodded, “He doesn’t have many friends, so not many people to tell.”

“Plus, most of the kids don’t really care. No one bats an eye about that kind of thing. Not anymore at least. Back when I first started teaching, the students whispered about rumours and all. Now they just sort of take it in stride.”

“I don’t know what to think.” He got to his feet to pace around the tables. “I just don’t understand it.”

“I can maybe help with that?” Neville hopped up too and nodded towards the castle. “Follow me.” He led them into the school, towards his quarters. “When Hannah started apprenticing with Poppy, the students started coming to her with questions. I guess they feel better talking to her about it because she’s only about a hundred years younger than Poppy.” He opened the door and gestured for Harry to sit. “Let me wash my hands. Should I call for tea?”

“No thanks, I’m fine,” Harry said, making himself comfortable on the tiny sofa of their sitting room.

Moments later, Neville came out of the bedroom with two slender books and sat next to Harry. “Here. This one is cheesy as hell, and a little old. But it’s still got some good information. This one is loads more detailed, but it’s really clinical and so kind of a boring read. Hannah gives it out to students all the time. But both of them will give you a big picture kind of thing.”

“Thanks Neville,” Harry said, glancing through the two books. “She won’t mind if I take them?”

“Nah, she’s got several copies in the infirmary.” Neville bumped Harry’s knee with his own. “It’s a different world than the one we grew up in.”

“I know. The war was shit for ruining us.”

“Mm, not just that though. I mean, you think my Gran or all the doddering old uncles and aunts would ever let me entertain the idea I might like a bloke?” He laughed and rolled his eyes. “With the family name needing an heir? Great Uncle Algie would have dangled me out of another window.”

“I’m sorry they continue to give you hell about it.”

“Eh, it’s fine. It’s tapering off now that I’m in my forties. I never did tell Gran it was because of Hannah. I was afraid she’d bump off my wife in some sort of ‘accident,’ and shove a new, more fertile wife at me.”

“Hannah has more patience than Augusta deserves.”

“For certain! Anyway, no one talked about it when we were young and if they did it was in gossipy whispers. Hannah and I are trying to help the students by being a little more positive and open about their options.”

“You’re a good man, Nev. They’re lucky to have someone like you in their lives. The Dursleys certainly didn’t think much of it all and… as much as I hate it, their voices still ring in my ears sometimes.” As usual he tamped down on any thoughts of his aunt and uncle that might ruin his entire fucking day. Worse than it already was.

He shook himself and smiled at Neville, waving the books. “Thanks, for these. I’ll give them a read and see if it helps any.” He chuckled to himself. “Like having homework again.”

“If you want, we can go see Hannah. See if she has any answers for you?”

“Thanks, but this is probably good to start with. I don’t even know what I have questions about. But I’ll reach out once I’ve done some reading.”

“You sure you don’t want to stick around for a bit?”

“Are you trying to distract me from my homework, Professor?” Harry teased.

Neville grinned and patted Harry on the back. “Come on, I’ll walk you out.” As they neared the Hogwarts gates, Neville said, “I’m sorry it all went pear-shaped with Albus. But I’m sure you two will work it out.”

“I hope so. We just need a little time.”

“He’s a good boy. And if it makes you feel better, he’s really, really happy with Scorpius. They’re good together.”

“I know. They’ve been friends forever and have always made each other better. It reminds me of me and Gin, you know? Marrying my best friend was the best thing I ever did. So I’m happy for him, making something with Scorpius, even if I don’t quite understand it.”

“Just let him know that, and it’ll all get better from there.”

Harry nodded and made Neville promise to tell Lily they’d catch lunch soon. He tucked the books in his jacket pocket and Apparated back home. Ginny had interviews with the Kestrels and would be gone all day, so Harry took the opportunity to sit quietly and read through the books, undisturbed. As described, some parts made him roll his eyes at their sappy ridiculousness, while others made his eyelids droop in sleepy boredom. But enough of it held his interest to turn an abstract concept into a more concrete one, and he continued reading on the sofa until Ginny got home.

She landed in a whirl of green flames and sighed in relief, brushing soot from her robes. “I didn’t think the Kestrels would ever let me go!” She collapsed on the sofa next to him and kissed his cheek. “They couldn’t stop gushing about the upcoming season and the perfect formations their chasers have been working on. As if every other team isn’t thinking the same. Anyway, how’d it go with Neville?”

“Good, I guess. He gave me a few books to read. Said Albus was happy with Scorpius and would probably forgive me eventually.”

“Of course he will,” Ginny said, shifting to drape her legs over Harry’s lap and rest her head on his shoulder. “Just give it time. Read anything good so far?”

It flitted through his mind how hard they had to work, in those early years together, to make these tiny intimacies come naturally to him. Sometimes they still didn’t, and Harry hated himself for it.

“Actually…” He flipped through the book to a page he’d made a mental note over. “I thought we could read this part together? Maybe see what you think about it?”

After so many years together, Ginny recognised the odd note in his voice, and perhaps understood they might not be talking about Albus anymore. Ginny smiled softly and kissed him on the cheek. “I’d be happy to read through it with you.”

They ate a quiet supper, and Harry read more after dinner while Ginny outlined her article about the Kestrels for the _Daily Prophet_. As they settled into bed that night, Harry said, “I think I’m going to visit Albus tomorrow.”

“Are you sure you’re ready? I don’t want you blundering in, making things worse.”

“Yeah. I don’t want to leave it and then get caught up in work on Monday.”

“Want me to come with you?”

Harry kissed her temple and sighed, “That would be perfect.” 

\--------

They debated the merits of bringing lunch along with them. Harry insisted everything would be awkward and no one would want to eat anything, while Ginny insisted it would be a distraction and give them all something to do in the awkward pauses. In the end, they compromised with several different biscuits and pastries to go with a pot of tea.

Harry wiped clammy hands on his jeans before knocking at the door of Albus and Scorpius’s flat. He didn’t have to worry about Albus slamming the door in his face, because it was Scorpius that answered.

“Oh, Mr and Mrs Potter,” he said, grey eyes opened owlishly wide. “Erm, come in.” 

“Is Albus here?” Ginny asked as they entered the flat. “We’ve brought snacks to share.” She pointed to the bag Harry carried.

“Erm, yes. He’s resting?” Scorpius twisted his hands nervously in the sleeve of his robe, looking so impossibly young. Was Harry ever so young? He gave himself a mental shake as Scorpius gestured vaguely down the hall. “I’ll - go - I’ll see if he’s up for visitors.” 

“Thank you. We’ll get the tea ready,” Ginny said, leaving no doubt that she expected Albus to join them. Harry followed her to the kitchenette and summoned dishes to set the table while she prepared a pot of tea.

They sat in tense silence at the kitchen table for several minutes, waiting on the boys. Ginny squeezed his fingers and whispered, “It’ll be all right.”

It didn’t feel all right, as the minutes stretched on for an eternity. The unnatural silence coming from the hall, indicating a silencing charm, didn’t help either. How hard was Scorpius having to beg or argue to get Albus out to see them? Maybe they should have owled ahead and given Albus the chance to decide when and where they met.

At long last, they emerged together, Scorpius a step behind Albus. Harry had a split second to wonder if they were sharing a single bedroom before Ginny distracted him with a cheery greeting and a hug for Albus.

“Are you doing all right?” she asked, cupping his cheeks and peering into his eyes. He looked so much like Harry at that age, it was almost like looking in a pensieve. She kissed Albus’s forehead when he nodded and pulled him gently to the table, adding a smile for Scorpius when he sat next to Albus. “We’ve had a few days to think about things, Albus, and your dad wanted to apologise. In person.”

He didn’t look in Harry’s direction at all, keeping his eyes trained on the table in front of him with his arms wrapped around his waist. He looked so young and vulnerable to Harry and he hated the smudged purple under his eyes that indicated a few bad nights of sleep. Albus didn’t deserve that.

Harry cleared his throat. “I, er, went to see Neville.” Albus stiffened but didn’t comment. “He gave me a few books to read. To maybe try and understand a little better. It was - eye opening for sure. Not sure I can look at rimming salt for margaritas ever the same again.”

Scorpius’s eyes bugged out and he smothered a sputtering cough, while Albus’s face turned a vibrant shade of red. Ginny frowned in confusion, “What’s wrong with salt?”

“Erm, nothing,” Harry said, blushing a little himself. His brand new vocabulary swam through his mind, but now wasn’t the time to ask about those things. “Just a joke, maybe a bad joke. We can talk about it later. Or never.” He tugged at his jumper. “I’m nervous. Maybe we can pour?”

Ginny poured tea for each of them. Harry gulped at the lukewarm tea, while Scorpius put a few pastries on a plate and offered it to Albus, who shook his head. Harry took a crumpet, mainly so he could shred it into tiny pieces to keep his hands busy.

“Look, there’s… “ Harry cleared his throat, trying to marshal his thoughts. “There’s loads I don’t understand. Maybe I never will, I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about the things I said - and I regret it but I can’t help but feel like… I have to lay out my thoughts. Out loud… So that someone can tell me when my train of thought has derailed.”

“Derailed and crashed into a lake leaving no survivors,” Albus muttered.

Harry’s mouth quirked into a half smile. At least Albus was responding. “Right so… yeah, I’m trying. Now. But it’ll take time. The books were good but… It’s not the same as…” He scrubbed at his hair, trying to pull his scattered thoughts together. “Do you - have you always felt this way? Was there a specific moment? Or was it gradual? I just - I want to understand, I _do_.”

“I’m not going through the whole thing again, all right?” Albus said, too loudly in the small kitchen. “If you need to be in my skin to understand I can pensieve some memorable wet dreams or -”

“Albus!” Ginny said sternly. “There’s no need to be crude.”

“Well I don’t know what else I can tell you! Maybe what I feel is none of your business!”

Tense, defensive magic crackled in the air as Albus became upset, and Scorpius mumbled a soft apology for letting them in the flat, and Ginny rose to Harry’s defence.

He cut loudly across all of them, “I think I’m jealous!”

All three of them looked at him in surprise. Albus broke the silence first with, “Oh Merlin, are you trying to tell me you’re gay too?” The unexpected comment had both Ginny and Harry choking on their tea, while Scorpius stared in horrified fascination.

“No!” Harry said, trying not to laugh at his son. “No definitely not!” He coughed again and sipped at his tea to clear his throat. “I’m just - thinking about all the things I read.” Harry’s new vocabulary swam through his mind. Heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual he had some sense about. But pansexual was new. As was asexual. It was the last one that set his heart racing now.

Ginny’s hand slipping into his steadied him enough to say, “And I’m not sure if I’m happy for you to have so many options available, or sorry that you have to wade through such a confusing mess to find who you are.” He looked down at Ginny’s hand, so much smaller than his own. 

“It doesn’t have to be complicated,” Albus said, eyes darting between Harry and Ginny.

“No, perhaps not. But I think if I’d had all these words at your age, I might have been overwhelmed by it all.” Other qualifiers, grey and demi, only clouded his thoughts more.

Albus crossed his arms, his brow furrowing. “I like my labels just fine.”

“Like I said… I’m jealous. Labels - the ones other people gave me - they fucked me up for a long time. And it made me happy to be free of them when I finally left that part of me behind. And even though it’s been so many years… It still feels like just yesterday I lived under the weight of other’s expectations. And there’s so much… I don’t know how you can be so _sure_.”

“I just know it. I just am.” Albus reached for Scorpius, and they shared a smile. Albus nodded at Ginny, “It’s like what you feel for Mum… only it’s Scorpius.”

Harry traced the curve of Ginny’s thumbnail with his eyes and thumb, to avoid Albus’s piercing gaze. It was on the tip of his tongue to say that was not, perhaps, the best comparison, but that wasn’t a burden he wanted to lay on his young son.

Best to just let it go. 

“I’ll get it eventually,” Harry said. “But it’ll take time. And patience on your part.”

“All right,” Albus said carefully, cocking his head to consider Harry.

“The most important thing, Albus… Aside from all my shortcomings and the decisions you make about your own life… I need you to know that no matter what, I love you.”

“I know.” The words slipped out automatically, in direct opposition to the defensive set of Albus’s shoulders.

“I love you.” He squeezed Ginny’s hand in his. “We both love you. No matter what.”

“O-okay,” Albus said quietly. Scorpius took his hand, squeezing it until his fingers turned white. They shared a look and Albus nodded. “Okay,” he repeated quietly.

“Right, well…” Harry smiled at Ginny. “I think that’s all I wanted to say.” 

Ginny gave him a smile and kissed the back of his fingers. When she stood, the others followed suit. She circled the table and gave Albus a long hug, whispering, “We love you so much, Albus.” She stepped back and smiled at Scorpius as well. “And you too, Scorpius.”

Harry hung back a little awkwardly, as usual not knowing if a hug was welcome or not. But then Albus reached for him and Harry met him halfway. He kissed his son’s temple and sighed, “We’re so proud of you. And I’m sorry I couldn’t say so on Friday.” Albus nodded, wiping at his eye as he stepped away. 

His sweet little boy. It seemed like only yesterday he was in nappies and didn’t know how to use a spoon. And now he had an internship and a flat to share with the love of his life. Harry decided hugging Scorpius would be all right, and gave him the same kiss on the temple. “Thank you. For always being there for Albus.” Wide eyed, Scorpius nodded and once again took Albus by the hand. 

“We’d like to have you over this week,” Ginny said. “For dinner. Maybe invite James too?”

The boys looked at each other for a moment, then Albus nodded. “Sounds lovely.” Ginny gave him one last hug, then they made their soft goodbyes.

She Side-along Apparated them both home, landing them in their comfortable, familiar sitting room. “Want some more tea?” she asked, pulling away. Harry tugged on her hand to stop her, full of words he didn’t know how to say. “Everything all right?” She took both his hands with a patient smile.

“I don’t regret it. Us. The life we’ve built. It’s made me happier than anything else ever could have.”

She hugged him lightly, tucking her head in under his chin. A perfect fit. “It’s been wonderful, Harry. All the ups and downs are part of life and ours has been a good one. A storybook ending.” Ginny squeezed him tight, then stepped back. “You know what we need? Fresh air. Let’s go for a fly instead of tea.”

“My lovely wife. You are as sensible as you are beautiful.”

“Flatterer,” she grinned. “Race you! Last one to the broom shed is a flobberworm grub!” And for good measure she shoved him back to unbalance him before running off giggling.

And he gave chase, as he always would, with a matching grin on his face.


End file.
